I Call Bullshit

I would like to file a complaint.

I recently (less than 3 weeks ago) bought a new pair of jeans. I needed a new pair, the last ones were shot. So I decided to spend a few bucks and buy a really nice pair. I was very happy with them. The color, the cut, the fit. Everything was just fine.

EXCEPT, I just realized that they ALREADY have a hole in them.

Oh, and where is that hole located, you might ask? Maybe somewhere innocuous, but easy to spot, like the knee or along the leg somewhere?

No, no, no. It's in the crotch. Yeah. That's right.

And here's the kicker - know how I found this out? Did I spot them when I took them off for the day and folded them up? No. Did someone see it and politely point out this egregious tear? No. No. I found out - this is so great - when I looked at a picture of myself that someone just took of me today. I noticed something off in the aforementioned crotch, some slight discoloration, suggesting some early wear and tear. When I investigated further, I saw there was no wear, just tear.

I'm pissed. These fucking things are 3 weeks old! I won't even divulge what I paid for them, it disgusted me even at the time of purchase, but I rationalized it somehow. But now I'm ready to crack skulls about it.

I'm going to return them this week. Because, as a man once said while sitting in a movie theater in back of me while we watched a terrible movie: This shit is bullshit.